Forsaken - Chapter 28

Chapter 28
Raju sat there in stunned silence. He could not believe what he was hearing. How can it be possible? But it was too real to be made up. He watched the hunched figure, sitting across the table, with a thin, grey beard and soiled clothes. If what he said was true, God was very cruel to him.

“I can’t believe it.” Finally he spoke. But he did not see any reason not to believe him.

“You wanted my side of the story. I gave it to you. Believe it or not, is there really any difference?” Ajit sported a scornful smile.

“Then what happened? You did not tell me the rest.” Raju was curious to know the whole of it.

“Then what? I washed up from a nearby tap as much as I could. I went home. Even before my reaching there, the news has reached there. The same guy who recognized me, had home number, and he called up Ammachi. It was the first time Ammachi beat me. With the broom, with whatever she could get. And she cursed me.” Ajit said in an emotion-less voice.

The most painful thing was Ajit thought, the final thing Ammachi said.

“As soon as you came out, your mother died. You came to make other’s suffer. Devil’s son. You will never get peace. Mother-killer. I never want to see your face again. Get lost.” She cursed him.

That was the last he saw Ammachi.

“Where were you all these years?” Raju asked in a low voice. He was moved by his story.
Ajit thought of the long years he spent in exile. How many cities it had been? The struggle to feed himself, the beatings he took from urchins, the streets where he slept for countless days.
Suddenly he felt another wave of pain washing through him. It had been only an hour or two since his last dose of medication, but the pain came back with a vengeance. Now the pain is not limited to his abdomen. He felt the sharp pangs under his chest. He flinched.

“Are you all right?” Raju saw him squinting as if in pain.

“Yeah, I am okay” he said through clenched teeth. He was not at alright. He suspected that his final days had begun. The beginning of the end.

“You are not going to ask about your father?” Raju questioned after a long pause.

“Kurien had lost everything in Dubai.” Since he did not answer his question, Raju ventured. “His partner cheated him and he was jailed for some time in Dubai. Then he returned home, with empty hands.”

Ajit did not feel any surprise. Nor did he feel elated. It was as if he was talking about somebody who was not related to him at all. It was all about some stranger.

“And his beloved son, Anish, he has become his headache now. He lost a lot of money in some business with his friends and now sitting idle at home” Raju was taking a perverse pleasure telling him that. He remembered how Kurien scorned this boy.

“Anita?” He did not even remember her face. She and her mother never considered him existing. He saw her only a few occasions.

“She was married off to some guy in Pala. I don’t know much about her.” Raju explained.

There was another long pause. Raju checked his watch. It’s four-fifteen now. He had to move. He motioned towards the boy who served them and asked for the bill.

As he counted the notes from his wallet he remembered he had not paid Ajit fully. He took out four five-hundreds from his wallet, thought for a moment, and then added another two.
“Here is the cab rent. I think I’ll have to go now.” Raju stood up to go.

“What will you do now? Would you inform father?” Ajit asked while hesitatingly accepted the money.

Raju did not know what to answer. He wasn’t sure what to do.

“I don’t know” finally he admitted.

“Please don’t. There is something I haven’t told you.” Ajit decided to come open with him.

Raju sat back. He was curious.

“I haven’t got a lot of time.” He started.

“What do you mean by that?” Raju questioned. The creases on his forehead were more visible now.
Ajit explained what Dr. Kulkarni told him. Raju was aghast.

“What? I can’t believe it. I mean you are very young” Raju was really wondering why Ajit was chosen for all these.

“Why I told you this is, I don’t want you to tell anybody about seeing me.” Ajit concluded.

“But I already told Susan.” Raju remembered his telephone conversation with Susan. Was it today itself? So many shocks since then, he thought.

“I hope she won’t tell anybody,” Ajit mumbled.

“No. She won’t,” he was thoughtful.

“Ok. Please forget about all these. There was nothing I could do, or you could have done. It’s my fate.” He stood up, started to lose his balance and then straightened.

“You did not take any medicines?” Raju stood up as well.

“No use. It’s all too late.” Ajit smiled at him. Strangely he was at peace.

“Aji, you never asked anything about Nisha.” Raju was contemplating whether to tell him. But this news is really shattered him, and he want to give him whatever good news he can.

Raju saw Ajit’s eyes sparkled for a second. That fleeting second, he saw that big, feminine eyes of that boy. Then it was gone.

Ajit just nodded. Raju explained about her studies in U.K. and her job there, why she was in India et al. Finally he informed him about her unwillingness to marry.

“I know about your relationship back then. I wasn’t against it, but your father’s attitude worried me. That’s why I forbade her from talking to you. I thought when you were able to support yourself, I could talk about it with your Ammachi.” Raju explained.

Ajit just smiled. He was happy to know at least one person from his past was doing well. She was an angel. She deserved only the best things in the world.

Then, without any preamble, Raju blurted out.

“Do you want to talk to her?”

Ajit’s heart skipped a beat. All the while, he was contemplating whether he should ask about her. But he refrained from it, fearing that Raju would get mad. Now Raju was asking the same question. But talk about what? About the past? About their love, which was never destined to be? Or his struggle? His initial euphoria died down. He realized that they were now in opposite poles. Moreover, it may open up old wounds.

Raju took his silence for assent.

“Right now she is in the conference. And tonight you can’t talk to her because Paappan Achayan will be coming. You tell me where to come and I’ll bring her. I’ll explain everything to her tonight. But…” Raju trailed off. He was devising a plan in his mind. If Nisha saw him in that condition, it could rekindle the old flames. But if Ajit agreed to do what he had in mind, she might just see the point they were stressing all along.

“But?” Ajit knew his heart would burst now.

“You have to tell her that you are married. Tell her you are married and have kids. You can say you married some local girl and you know….” He once again did not complete his sentence. Raju was feeling guilty to do this to the man, but he was, after all, Nisha’s father. Only her well-being mattered to him now.

Ajit let out a knowing smile. Yes, this is what it is. Everyone is selfish. He wants to use me to help her make up her mind. Hell, why not. If she gets a good life, my life would worth something.

He agreed and told him where to come. “Come to the Khar Railway station, on the west side of it, and ask any Cigarette vendor where Ajit Bhai, Taxiwallah, would be. They will know where to find me”

Raju said he would get another cab, since Ajit had drunk too much and it was not a good idea to drive now. Raju told him to give him a call if there was anything he could do, he would be glad to help. Ajit said he would. They parted ways.